Why is there a rabies-infested, deranged cat screaming outside?
Why does it feel like Electric Circus and why won't it stop?
Did I sleep at all last night?
Answers: it's not a cat, it's a parrot. It's coming from the elderly Swedes. No, definitely not.
The alpine parrots, also called keas, are loud and social birds that had the cabin surrounded. This would have been cute if I were awake, but after a night of little Z's, it was fury inducing. Adding to my anger was that wretched light that the older man was seemingly directing into my eyeballs from one foot away. For at least twenty minutes. In a dark room.
I'm pretty sure it was one of those high powered LED ones you're supposed to strap to a bicycle. I dramatically threw my sleeping bag over my head hoping he would get the hint. He didn't. The light carried on, and so did my disdain for that sweet old man. Luckily he kept the glow sticks in his pack.
I got out of bed/sleeping bag. Lace and I made breakfast. The Students were throwing packs together and some of the other hikers were getting ready for the day of the climb. I knew I needed double, doubly strong coffees if I had any chance of getting through the morning.
No problem, I told myself. You'll feel better after food, caffeine, and a tooth brushing. Just need to go outside and find my boots in the pile and....
... Why does my right boot look different than the left?
Because a kea, which I'm told by a guide book I should feel "lucky" if I encounter, ripped out my boot lining and probably ate it. I told this to Lacey and also hoped the bird lost its ability to fly or eat or make any noise as a result of his petty theft.
Did he not realize I had six hours of climbing on rocks to do that day?
I doubled up right foot socks, cursed the bird again for good measure, and we got on our way. Mr. O, the teacher for The Students (who must moonlight as some kind of mountain man), gave some tips and tricks to the kids to essentially avoid falling off the hillside and getting good pictures. We took advantage of those.
We had a lot of uphill walking to do. I learned that Lacey is very good at Two Truths and a Lie. I also learned about the strength of the wind on that track, and the weakness of my entire body when I'm trying not to be blown off the mountain by it.
Lots of pictures were snapped at the top, most of which are on my real camera so these are just a few to share.
We were starving so we grabbed some food and then made our way to a hut. A learning opportunity presented itself:
Not sure I needed to know that, but I believed it.
We started the descent which I quickly learned was far more difficult than the climb. I was blabbing about all the mountaineering movies I love when I heard Lacey slip behind me. Thankfully (!!!) she didn't fall off the mountain but she was kind of upside down.
I'm awful in these kinds of scenarios. Adding to the challenge was the foot width of the path. Lace banged up her knee so I rifled through my bag for my band aids, which I put in an easily accessible spot in case of emergency.
After I unpacked most of my bag on the path, I couldn't find them, and Lacey had to go through her own bag to get the band aids she packed, in an easily accessible spot in case of emergency.
We took our time for the rest of the descent. No more fancy footwork until we got back to the bottom of the steepest part. We clambered over many more suspension bridges, avalanche passes and water ways to make our way to the next shelter for lunch.
Here we met another kea who was not even a little afraid of a human. He sat next to us and tried to take our stuff. Not just food, but anything he could get his beak on. He was very interested in my phone.
At one point I got so annoyed at the parrot, I yelled at him like a bad dog, "NO!!!" I didn't see a British fellow coming around the corner, who thought I was shouting at him. Oops. He didn't seem to mind as he quickly took a liking to the "two young birds", and he was not referring to the actual feathered creatures next to us. We did our best to avoid Birdman on the trail but decided he was harmless.
It felt like another long chunk of time to the next rest point. I don't think I remembered how to tell time, I was so tired. At the rest spot, we were presented with a Choose Your Own Adventure option: keep going another hour to your last hut, or add another 1.5 hours to see Sutherland Falls. And then walk another hour to your last hut. See what happens.
We decided to head to the falls. We dropped our packs at the rest point and carried on without them. You would think losing the heavy weight would put a spring in our step. Magically, it made us incredibly slow and for a brief moment (ie an hour), I was hoping the waterfall did something spectacular like rain puppies or turn into chocolate a la Wonka, because those were the only outcomes that would make hiking more than we had to, worthwhile.
Okay. The falls were pretty awesome. The spray was cold, refreshing and lovely.
I had a few minutes of delirium where I either pretended I was a dinosaur, or actually thought I was one,
and started running around the waterfall-soaked ground like it was Land Before Time. Birdman was waiting behind a rock for us and probably saw this happen. I can't explain what that level of physical exhaustion plus no sleep was doing to me. Somehow, our spirits remained mostly high, likely due to perfect weather.
We left the falls, trudged back to the rest point and devoured chocolate and caffeine and trail mix. It was the only way we would make it through another hour.
I don't remember anything about that last leg except for my actual legs. Lace and I talked at length about how much our feet were killing us. Then, the cabin appeared in all its glory. We threw down our packs, flung off our boots and ran (okay, shuffled) to the swimming hole. Ice cold water on swollen feet? Incredible.
On our final night, we had no recipe to follow except boil water, add to bag, let stand, eat. Good thing, because I don't think we could have handled anything more complicated than that. We spent the evening chatting with our fellow hikers and I was relieved to hear that one woman cried on the way to the falls, she was so spent. She was in good company!
I was happy it was the last night in a hut. Given the distance we travelled that day and that much mountain air, there was nothing to do but crash for the night and be rested for 18km on the final hiking day.
